2 more weeks

After a few beautiful days of warm weather, the fog has returned to cool us down. Yesterday after a nice evening walk to the Conservatory of Flowers we stopped in the local tattoo parlor around the corner. I would like to get another one but I don't know exactly what yet. It's all about design and location. Anyway, I pass by their sign all the time and we finally checked it out, it's pretty nice and terribly convenient. We'll see. A new tattoo would be a bit of a luxury for someone who will not have steady work in a couple of weeks.

Today was especially challenging being at work. We have another big invitation mailing for the next event and I wasn't in the mood to stuff envelopes, sigh. Also, I was in the hallway sitting on the floor talking to Uney on my cell phone (everyone takes cell phone calls in the hall) and wouldn't you know it, my boss walks by, sees me and doesn't say anything, oy vey, so I walked to the elevator and went downstairs to finish my call. Well, what's she gonna do really? Fire me sooner than my quit date? Hello. So I'm trying to finish one last project from my other boss, do my regular duties, try and respond to requests from my Ad Reps nicely, clean out my desk & computer a little each day, and TCB when I can with 10 days left which feels like 10 months.
Next I have two appointments with Temp agencies lined up.

This is George's big weekend. He will be a guest filmmaker at the Toronto International Jewish Film Festival. If you're going to be in Canada (Ontario Province) this weekend, check out the debut screening!

p.s. check out Summer's May 8 blog entry - she created a really cool little zine.
http://www.summerpierre.com/blog.html

Amazing Race

The race ended practically across the street from us! I had no idea it would end in San Francisco and specifically at the entrance gate of the Botanical Garden in Golden Gate Park! George and I couldn't figure out how we didn't know about that since we are there all the time. It would have been neat to see all of them including Phil. Oh well.

Weekend

Beautiful weather in the Bay Area this weekend! We walked to the beach & back on Saturday and enjoyed a picnic in the park this afternoon complete with white sangria made by yours truly!
I enjoyed watching "The Pursuit of Happyness" last night. I love when movies are shot in San Francisco, but it was quite a story! He overcame such extreme hardships. Cecil from Glide is in the film, and we recognized a cameo in the beginning of the man who wears a white suit and top hat at the corner of Powell and Post street and sings that song "...the whole world smiles with you..." all the time. I also remember seeing the pseudo muni/bart station at Duboce Park on my commute for a few weeks! It looked so real and it's the part in the movie where Will Smith runs on a flat lawn through a little park into the station. Now it's just back to being dog park.

This is an exciting week for George. His latest film which is so incredibly unique and innovative, "The Diary of Niclas Gheiler" is screening at the Toronto International Jewish Film Festival and he will be attending Thursday - Saturday. May this be the beginning of greater success for my sweetheart, xoxo.

I will continue to TCB (take care of business), fun things like a dental cleaning, temp agency applications and another call about health insurance, and research for our Tahoe trip.

13 more days

Trying to plan and take care of as much as I can this month. Insurance is a bummer to say the least. Just found out Blueshield is discontinuing new enrollments for their short-term coverage plans after June 30. So I mosey over to Blue Cross and they have something similar (6 mos. coverage for nearly $500 with a high deductible so I really won't use it - just pay to have it). It's hurting my head but I need to wrap that up next week.

Some fears paralyzed me last night about money. I started to worry about how I'd manage without a steady income and adjusting to earning less. Who knows but somewhere in my psyche I believe that when I get on the authentic path and find good work I will enjoy doing, I will be able to earn a nice living. I've read enough stories to know that provision moves in. I've recently decided that the best way to earn a better wage and keep a flexible schedule would be to temp for awhile. It's a great way to see all sorts of other businesses and companies with less commitment while I continue to explore and soul-search. I'd like to attempt freelance writing at some point too. I learned of an interesting new book by Ariel Gore called "How to become a famous writer before you're dead."

I'm just not comfortable not working at all because hey, let's face it, San Francisco isn't a cheap place to live. However, I look forward to getting creative and adding to our low-and-no budget things we can do. We're already pretty good at that.

Jetset to PDX

Had a great trip to Portland! Such fun wandering the rooms of books galore and all sorts of gift items and journals at the one-and-only Powells! A weekend of good company, good conversations, good food and wine.

Great to visit w/Shelley & Chris after all these years.
Great to meet Spencer, the most handsome bird ever.

Beginning Transition List

In the works:
1. Notice has been given.
2. A new to-do list with completion-target-dates has been created.
3. Health insurance is being researched.
4. A new budget is in the works.
5. Coaching w/Cynthia.

To do:
1. Spring cleaning & purge
2. Order new glasses
3. Mother's day card
4. Apply for interesting part-time jobs
5. Network
6. Document my story - write write write

To enjoy:
1. Time with George
2. Anne Lamott's new book "Grace Eventually"
3. DVD's to rent: Pursuit of Happyness, Freedom Writers, Bobby, The Queen
4. Staying in touch with good friends
5. More exercise
6. New ideas and opportunities to discover daily

A new path

The time has come.
I'm leaving my j-o-b.

Looking for new things to try and a more authentic path
Excited to see where it leads
Very little plans and preparations this time
Open to possibilities
There is a better way
and I will find it.

23 more days at my j-o-b
and hopefully a little trip to Tahoe will follow.

Time to exercise my faith
Pay attention to everything
talk to people, try new things
and write my own story.

Breath of fresh air

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. - Anais Nin

time for a change

Change is in the air.
I've decided it's time to make a big break from the corporate office world and explore other ways and means of living and finding new sources of income. I've got to a point where I can't fake it for one more minute. Even though I work for a good company and it is a nice place to work, I'm far too unhappy in my position to justify staying.

Sometimes you just get to the point where you must leap and then the net will appear, I hope!

a cup of spring

Easter Sunday

Happy Easter

God bless you

Questions that need new answers

Why is Armando Benitez still the closer for the Giants?

(It's great to see Rich Aurelia back though!)

Why do we stay in work situations that do not enhance our well-being?

(Dependent on Income & Benefits)

How much potential could I unleash if I left my uncomfortable comfort zone?

(who knows?)

George and I had a conversation about each day being brand-spanking new and the unlimited possibility each morning holds.

Keeping positive and productive

trying to keep noise, distractions, or unwelcome thoughts from tainting it.

Paying attention

not to miss the messages or miracles directed your way.

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday my dear Uney!
Looking forward to our visit
Please confirm my reservation at the Tuscan villa...

Lent / Easter Poem

The dark days of Lent
Have pierced my soul
With an undeniable urge for more
More living of life
To break out
Present
Aware
To risk
Living my life, MORE

Going through daily motions
Alive
Washing my face awake
Tasting my oatmeal
Writing words from the heart
And imagination
Making active
Life-giving choices

The risen Christ
Has made the way
For our redemption
And empowers us
With the Holy Spirit
Will we walk with Him
In that power
Will we walk with Him
In such sacrificial love
Redeeming the time
Using our gifts
Drawing near to the Lord
Will we rise up
Take risks
Help others
Be all we can

Spring

Happy First Day of Spring

Let them eat cake

Today I took a class, "One Great Cake" and this is my first 3-layer cake.

The cakes were already prepared so we cut the cakes in half to make our layers, put in two layers of filling, frosted & decorated the whole outside with butter cream. It was a fun & artistic experience for me! I am pleased with my first cake. I didn't realize what was involved in the world of frosting & decorating. It's a skill that requires lots of practice. The hardest part was frosting the whole outside and smoothing it with the tools and techniques I learned. I have a whole new appreciation for those flawless smooth cakes!

It was fun and this instructor teaches all sorts of classes (www.bakingarts.net). I'll check his class schedule and attempt another lesson soon!

email poetry

Beautiful day here

Can't wait for the

weekend to begin

Boboli with salad and French wine

await us tonight

I can't wait to hug George

again

Maybe we will take a walk

in the park with the added daylight

hours in the evening

This weekend

holds an appointment at the salon

and the anticipation of a cake class on Sunday afternoon.

The rest of the open spaces

will be played by ear

outdoors

walking

holding hands.

Chores will sneak their way in

they always do

but I don't mind

I want to be a better

listener

quiet and attentive like the butterfly

considering the flower above.

Haiku

The sun warms my back
Fresh air, blue skies, clear my mind
The grass cools my toes

Why I keep getting up in the Morning:

Why I keep getting up in the Morning:

A fresh start
God still has a plan for my life
To spend another day with George
Harvest grain pancakes
walks in Golden Gate Park
the Sunday paper
hocus focus
hope
change
to improve
make a difference somehow
homemade pizza and red wine
to do some writing
find a new career direction
to be warmed by the sunshine
books that inspire
ginger tea
explore more of Europe
visit South America
talk with or email friends & family
Farmer’s market
cherry blossoms
fall leaves
to listen to raindrops tapping on my window
French toast topped with mango, blueberries & banana
To sculpt my body with exercise
To notice something beautiful

Email Poetry

At noon on Monday
a break in the rain
I put on my beige coat with the hood
And walked the slick downtown streets of San Francisco
To the bookstore.
endless possibility
I suppose the library can be too
But I prefer the bookstores.
new books with pristine pages
Enticing our imaginations
other cities, distant countries, or worlds
helping us navigate our own world
Adventures, experiences, inspiration, learning,
Whatever you fancy at the time.

I discovered a new author,
Katherine Lanpher
drawn to the title of her book
“Leap Days, Chronicles of a Midlife Move”.
I browsed the magazines
Paying attention to what I'm drawn to
As discussed with good friend Mira Sunday
finding the passion
in our writing
I looked at yoga journal, spirituality & health, body & soul,
Writers Digest, National Geographic Traveler,
And The Sun recommended by Mira.
I purchased one book called “Not Buying It, My year without Shopping”
By Judith Levine, which is a memoir
based on one year sans consumerism.
Hence my interest is in memoirs
with a purpose and focus.
Off the top of my head
Marlene Schiwy “Simple Days, A Journal on What Really Matters”, Elizabeth Gilbert “Eat, Pray, Love”, Marlena De Blasi “A Thousand days in Venice”, Sue Monk Kidd “When the Heart Waits, Spiritual Direction for Life's Sacred Questions”.
Oh, and Laura Fraser's memoir written in second person,
“An Italian Affair”.
These stories taking place over a year
where they Question
and explore an area of life.
A food or culinary memoir would be interesting too.
I love reading about these sorts of experiences
and transformations.

When my hour was up,
I braved wind and rain
back to work,
my mind still in a world
eloquent writings
bringing to life the East Coast or
Italian piazza's or ashrams in India,
where all you need is a purpose and a pen.
I wondered if I could find
or create such a story from my life