I decided it's time to let go of some ideas and beliefs. Those I've revised in my mind and those out of my control. I believe that by letting go of these expectations removes the disappointment factor, consequently inviting the element of surprise. Either way, I think this will help me to make peace in my own heart and to feel positive and motivated to continue living my life the best I can. In the end, I simply want my life to count for God's purposes & using my gifts & talents, to have loved well, and lived well.
1. A dream job.
I don't think I have one!! I have started to resolve that it's okay to have a j-o-b that you are good at, and that supports your lifestyle and needs. My dreams aren't about work anyway. They are about travelling, learning, and continuing to write. Those are thing I will continue do regardless of a job. The fact is, I need income, health insurance and a 401K. It works better for me to get those things met at a decent company.
2. Marriage.
Yes, I always hoped to get married when it's right, but I no longer want to have to persuade or defend that desire. I am happy in my relationship with my Georgie (of six years) and I want to be with him and share our lives and loves.
To those people who in my life who feel this might be giving up or compromising, please understand that it is really just a new and improved perspective. I don't want to continue hoping for things that unlikely, I'd rather just hope for that which I can work towards. I am choosing to set those expectations free and let the weights go. Free myself up to live in the present and live the best I can each day, open to its gifts, challenges, or even surprises. That's all we really have anyway.
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